First Week Blues

I have had three days of school, and already want to quit.  I keep trying to tell myself that things will get better, but I can’t seem to see through the fog of not knowing what the hell I am doing.  For some reason, I felt that UTeach prepared me for school- but really, that’s nowhere near the truth.  There so many things I have never thought about that make teaching almost unbearable.   I don’t know how to get organized, I don’t know how to plan a full curriculum, and I don’t feel confident enough to deal with all of the fucked up things that 9th graders have to say to each other.  I feel like Rick Smith’s proverbial “Mr. Meanswell.”

Let me summarize some of the crazy shit that went on this week.  First of all, the schedule at my school is absolute nightmare.  It’s almost like college, only entirely crazy.  MWF classes are 45 minutes.  TTH classes are 70.  I teach 3 courses of Global Studies.  I see some of my courses on some days, and some on others.  I only see ALL of my classes on TTH, and then not in the same order.  On Tues for example, I see Class 3 then 2, then 1.  On Thurs I see class 1, then 2, then 3.  I see class 1 on MTWTh, class 2 on TWThF, and Class 3 on MTThF. Really, this makes me completely off schedule. I have no clue how to teach in this format.  I have sought help, but don’t know how to really put everything together.

Second, we STILL don’t have a proper schedule.  I woke up yesterday and learned that I had to teach a recovery class.  Today,  that changed.  I also apparently have 2 study halls I’m supposed to monitor as well as an Advisory class.

Third, I have no airconditioning in my class. This means that my kids are hot, irritable, and sweaty. I am also exceedingly sweaty because I have been in my crazy hot classroom all day.  I seriously believe that I sweat out at least 5lbs a day.  This is no good, considering I haven’t really figured out how to eat properly.  Hot kids + hot teacher = bad news bears.

Fourth, procedures just don’t make sense.  Don’t know how to do them. Don’t know how to implement them.  Don’t know how to teach them.

I’m falling apart…